A Complex, Negative Situation Transformed into Hopeful Outcomes
A group of teenage boys were sitting outside school one afternoon. An eleven year old girl – let’s call her Katie - walked passed them. The boys made rude remarks at her. Katie came home and talked to her father, Jake, telling him what the boys had said to her.
Jake jumped into the car, drove off to the group of boys and proceeded to assault them, injuring the eardrum of one of them. Two mothers laid a charge of assault against Jake.
The prosecutor then asked the RJC to step in, and also sent Jake to an anger management course. The RJC facilitator contacted the various parties individually. The mothers just wanted to know why this man had assaulted their sons.
After completing the anger management course Jake admitted he hadn’t realized he’d hurt the boy’s eardrum so badly. He explained that he had been retrenched a while back and had started drinking heavily. At the time of the assault, he had just stopped, and was feeling very stressed. We organized a victim-offender conference that was attended by everyone - the group of boys, their parents, Katie and Jake.
Katie told how she had felt when the boys were making bad remarks to her. Then the boys explained how they felt when Jake arrived and assaulted them. Jake told his story. He confessed that he at first hadn’t believed the injury was so bad.
The two mothers who had made the case wanted him to apologize and know why he did it. He explained that Katie got harassed so much that it made him so angry. It helped the mothers because they realized it had not been a personal thing, but had to do with Jake’s own issues. Jake apologized and promised to pay the medical bills.
The boys apologized to Katie. We reported back to the court and explained what had happened. The prosecutor understood the context of the incident and decided withdraw the matter. It was significant that: • Jake accepted responsibility, paid for expenses, went through a course and apologized. • The boys accepted responsibility, understood that their behaviour was inappropriate and apologized to Katie • The medical expenses were compensated.
If this process had not been followed there may have been a lengthy court case and a criminal record for Jake. He would likely not have had the opportunity to explain to the mothers of the boys what had prompted his behaviour. The mothers would not have received compensation for the medical expenses.
Norms and values about appropriate behaviour would not be have been affirmed in this way, nor would the opportunity to apologize, make things right and start over have been made possible.A